WATCH: Judy and Karin Talk about Same-Sex Binational Couples on Outlook Video

Torn Apart author Judy Rickard and her wife Karin Bogliolo have been on the front lines of our fight for equal rights for same-sex binational couples. If you haven't read about Judy and Karin, or heard about any of their recent activism, including a trip to Las Vegas to be in the audience when President Obama announced his plans for Comprehensive Immigration Reform earlier this year, as well as a recent trip to Washington DC where Judy was named a Cesar Chavez Champion of Change, this video will introduce you to the self-proclaimed "Golden Girls" of our movement. We can all be inspired by their tireless advocacy on behalf of same-sex binationals.

Judy and Karin: Volunteering for Our Cause Leads to a Handshake and a Few Words with President Obama

Guest post by Judy Rickard, author of Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law

I wanted to share the experience my wife Karin and I had attending President Obama's speech on Comprehensive Immigration Reform (CIR) in Las Vegas this week.

I think it's important to remember that we are all volunteers in the struggle to get green cards and permanency for our spouses and families. None of us are paid to do this work. Some of us have special talents we share. Others help by doing as asked, or getting other volunteers or whatever. Some may just make or collect donations. That's great too. That's what makes Out4Immigration a community - shared grassroots organizing and volunteering and success. Sometimes something too good to pass up happens, too. This was one of those times. But first, a bit of history...

Karin and I found out about O4I several years ago when I went to a town hall meeting on immigration in San Jose. Rep. Mike Honda and Rep. Luis Gutierrez headed it up. It was at a Catholic Church. I had recently shared my story with Mike, my Congressional Representative, and he had learned more about the issue facing same-sex binational couples. I was prepared to say something at the town hall, based on what we thought would happen that night. When we got to the church hall, two things happened that made me work harder to solve my problem. First, we were told that nothing about gays and lesbians could be shared at the hall that night. Ouch! And second, two guys came in wearing t-shirts that I thought were the coolest things I had ever seen. Turned out to be Amos and Mickey Lim, two of the founders of O4I. I asked them where I could get a shirt and I met O4I that night.

Get your t-shirt here!

Fast forward to 2013 and four more years of working to get a green card for my wife and get this issue solved for all of us. Where am I? In a high school gymnasium in Las Vegas, Nevada. Why? I've been invited by the White House to be at the President's speech on CIR. Invited by the White House! At first, I told them we could not afford to come. But then we were urged to go by friends in the cause, Love Exiles Foundation, and then Karin got really excited and took money out of savings. In less than 24 hours of hearing about it, we were on the plane. Wow!

Over the years, I have shared on my blog how it feels to document your life while you live it. For any same-sex binational couple trying to get a green card, you know there are days when you are tired of everyone knowing your business, federal officials dictating your life choices, stress others don't have, and just sheer exhaustion from the process. 

Two very powerful moments happened...

We know all that. But somehow this event seemed to make that all go away for a bit. We felt empowered and hopeful. We clapped and cheered. But we also felt bad when the words we wanted to hear did not come from the President's mouth as he stood on the podium. All was not lost or sad, though. Two very powerful moments happened and I can tell you with certainty because they happened to me and us.

Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano was to be seated behind us. As she walked in, I talked to her about our issue and shook her hand and thanked her for her efforts thus far. She said "It's in the President's proposal," meaning inclusion of same-sex binational families in comprehensive immigration reform.

...we shook President Obama's hand and reminded him we need his help. What did he say? "We won't forget you! You're in there!"

As the President concluded his speech, he did the rope line - shaking hands along the edge of the seating area. Since we had been given front row seats, Karin and I were at the rope line! In spite of the crush of people who surged behind us and pushed us into the barrier, we shook President Obama's hand and reminded him we need his help. What did he say? "We won't forget you! You're in there!" Wow! We were both shaking his hands at the time. It was surreal - really surreal.

So we felt terrific about those two moments, along with all the day's other wonderful bits, as Karin would say. Who came in and sat next to us? Jose Antonio Vargas, that's who! He and I screamed and hugged like middle school girls - we love each other so and respect each other's work so. I got my photo taken with Secretary of Labor Hilda Solis before we entered the gym. That was terrific! We met a staffer from the White House Office of Engagement, Julie, who will be getting a signed copy of my book in the mail soon. I met several elected officials and immigration organization executives who were interested in our slice of the immigration reform pie and they will be getting signed books, too. 

Speaker John Perez from the California State Assembly was there and we got duck pins from him after Karin asked if he had any ducks with him. We learned of his hobby in Sacramento in 2011 when we were there as I got an award for my LGBT activism from the State Assembly.

Our young friend Omar Torres from San Jose came to the event - we got him a ticket after he contacted me. I love to see younger folks doing the work and learning the ropes so we know immigration and civil rights work will continue. Guess I feel like a mother hen, but that's ok!
 

Of course being in Las Vegas, we had to have a little tourist time. We made a few bucks on a nickel machine to help pay the plane and food bills. We walked around a bit and saw interesting things. 

But I blogged and talked to reporters too. It wasn't all just play, that's for sure. I encourage you to read the blog I wrote about the speech event before it happened. Go to: http://tornapart.findhornpress.com/?p=11345 

For the blog I wrote after the speech is at this link. Go to http://tornapart.findhornpress.com/?p=11361

The complete immigration reform proposal from President Obama, which includes same-sex binational couples/families is in this blog, Go to: http://tornapart.findhornpress.com/?p=11408

We were thrilled to get this picture from our family in the UK who saw us this close to the President on their TV!

If you want to follow my adventures trying to get the U.S. government to recognize my marriage, go to: http://tornapart.findhornpress.com

You can see the Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/pages/Torn-Apart-United-by-Love-Divided-by-Law/116343758442046?ref=hl

You can see the Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law Portrait Project Facebook page at

https://www.facebook.com/unitedbylovedividedbylaw?ref=hl

You can also follow me on twitter @tornapartbook

My favorite photo of our trip to Vegas? My wife Karin and a couple of showgirls!

Judy Rickard is the author of Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law, a book which documents the lives of more than 20 same-sex binational couples affected by exclusion of equal immigration rights for gay and lesbian Americans in realtionships with foreign nationals. Judy generously donates royalties from the book's sales to three groups working with same-sex binationals - Out4Immigration, Love Exiles and Immigration Equality. The phrase "United by Love, Divided by Law" was coined by Out4Immigration. Judy uses the phrase as a subtitle to her book with our permission. If you have a project you would like to launch using the phrase, or to volunteer with Out4Immigration, contact us at info@out4immigration.org.

"Torn Apart" Author Judy Rickard Gives Sermon at Metropolitan Community Church

The author of Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law, Judy Rickard was invited to deliver the sermon at the Metropolitan Community Church in San Francisco this past weekend.

Judy and her wife Karin, a British citizen, are currently filing for a marriage-based green card. They have been at the forefront of the fight for same-sex binationals for several years now. Here's what Judy told the congregation in her sermon, "For Love or Country?"

"I am no preacher. I am no Biblical scholar. I am a 64-year-old lesbian with an immigration problem, my wife and our marriage.

I want to share this problem, this issue, with you tonight at Victor’s invitation. I am Judy Rickard, an American citizen. My wife, Karin Bogliolo, is not. Karin, 72 last month, was born German, but became a British citizen after her mother remarried.

Because we are both women, my country will not let ME sponsor MY WIFE for immigration to live here with me. If I was a man, or my wife was, (I know that sounds funny) that would not be the case. But we are women, lesbians, and that is our immigration problem. And that is extreme cruelty on our government’s part. And it gives us discrimination fatigue because it has been going on so long.

Our marriage is the product of a love that emerged in surprising circumstances. We met online when Karin was visiting America. Neither of us thought this would happen. But it did. We did not ignore it. We took a risk to be together. We are happy together. We committed to each other. We want our love, our commitment, to continue. We want to be together. But in America today, DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act, defines marriage as between one man and one woman. Period. No other option.

So America denies our marriage. America believes we are legal strangers. We face the ultimate discrimination – we cannot safely and legally live here together until the law changes. We have been together since 2006, when we committed to each other. But the reality is that we have been apart about half of our relationship – living in different countries because of DOMA.

So I have had to face this choice that no one should face – love or country? No American should have to choose between country and spouse. No American should have to choose between country and career. No American should have to leave America to be with the one they love. But I had to."

(Read the rest on Judy's blog. Click here.)

Special thanks - as always to Judy - for mentioning the work of Out4Immigration.

Radio Interview with Lavi Soloway and Judy Rickard

Judy Rickard, author of Torn Apart, United by Love Divided by Law, and Stop the Deportations attorney Lavi Soloway are interviewed by Marilyn Pitman from Out in the Bay.

Click here to listen to this radio broadcast, originally aired on July 12.

Lavi talks at length about the current situation for same-sex binational couples, various lawsuits, actions and directives that are all set to converge in a "post-DOMA world" we hope will come about with the reelection of President Barack Obama in November. He also speculates on what could happen should Mitt Romney become president.

Meanwhile, Judy talks about how she and her wife Karin are now clients of Lavi's and their actions of "civil disobedience" as they petition for a green card for Karin.

MSNBC: Same-Sex Couples Fight for Immigration Rights!

Judy Rickard and Karin Bogliolo were interviewed by Thomas Robert at MSNBC this morning to talk about the reintroduction of the Uniting American Families Act (UAFA) last week.

During the interview, the couple disclosed that they have recently traveled to Vermont to get married! We just want to say thank you to this fearless couple, who are always willing to speak out at any opportunity about the struggles faced by same-sex binational couples trying to stay together in this country! You can watch the video of their interview below.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

We would also urge you to head on to change.org after you have finished watching the interview to join our weekly petition to try to get more support for EQUAL immigration rights for same sex binational couples. The link to the petition is here: http://tinyurl.change.org/KmsTQ

If you are interested in reading / buying Judy's book, Torn Apart - United by Love, Divided by Law, head on to findhornpress.com to buy a copy. If you use the code, OUT416, when you check out at findhornpress, a $4 donation will be earmarked for Out4Immigration.

United by Love, Divided by Law

by Judy Rickard (This post originally appeared in The Advocate.)

The news that Lavi Soloway, long associated with the fight for same-sex binational couples to be together in America, had held off the deportation of Rodrigo Martinez, keeping him in Maryland with his legally-married husband Edwin Echegoyen, made me cry.

The last few weeks have given me more hope than the last few years have that same-sex binational couples like mine can overcome the pain and suffering U.S. immigration and marriage laws cause us. I am thrilled to see that people in government are listening. It means that we might one day not be seen as legal strangers by the United States government. Our relationships must be recognized. Our marriages and families, if not validated, continue the current status that we face. We do not have the equal rights our country espouses.

I now have hope that my partner Karin and I will no longer be geographic yo-yos. I can see a glimmer of hope for the couples and families with children I have interviewed for my book Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law. I feel like they can be together where they want, without fear and without extra expense and separation. I hope I am right.

Last year, my family was torn apart again because I cannot sponsor my partner for immigration to the United States. I tried. I had filled out the forms at Congressman Mike Honda's office. But the request was denied by the federal government.

So when her visa ran out in October, Karin had to leave. I stayed behind because my brother-in-law was battling his second bout with cancer. I stayed in America to help him and my sister. But before Karin could return, we lost John. When Karin finally came home, she had to endure more than an hour of questioning by ICE — Immigration and Customs Enforcement — officers before being allowed a visit with me.

New census data will give us updates, but an estimated 36,000 Americans deal with this situation today. LGBT couples and families face being torn apart, being deported, living in the shadows or facing unspeakable acts when returned to their home countries if denied asylum here.

We are not legal strangers. Our families matter. We pay the same taxes and face the same challenges as other families. We want the same opportunities and promises that America offers all its citizens.

U.S. immigration law must include provisions for same-sex partners, the same as opposite gender spouses, or we continue to be discriminated against. U.S. marriage law must allow same-sex marriage to be recognized federally and in each state or we continue to face discrimination and second class status is maintained.

Let the news stories we have seen — and felt good about — these past few days be the beginning of a sweeping move by America to right these wrongs and extend liberty and justice to those of us who feel the sting of its absence - and right away!

Note: Judy Rickard is the author of the book "Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law" available from Findhorn Press. The book tells the stories of 18 same-sex binational couples and provides and excellent resource list. Order the book at this link and enter the code OUT416 -a $4 donation will then be made to Out4Immigration.

Immigration Rights for Same-Sex Binational Couples Making Headlines – UAFA Picks Up Call for LGBT Rights after DADT Repeal

by Kathy Drasky

The first step toward equal marriage and immigration rights for LGBT people in the several countries that provide these rights started with allowing gays and lesbians to openly serve in their country’s military.

With the repeal of DADT at the end of 2010, LGBT groups and activists looking to keep the momentum alive toward full federal equal rights in the United States have turned toward immigration rights for gay and lesbian American citizens with foreign partners - same-sex binational couples – as the next logical step in our civil rights struggle (short of full repeal of DOMA and eventual passage of the Employment Nondiscrimination Act, or ENDA).

Getting the LGBT community behind the Uniting American Families Act (UAFA), legislation that would add three words to existing US immigration law and include “or permanent partner” wherever the word “spouse” appears was initially a hard sell. There were those who wanted full federal equal marriage rights – all 1,138 of them – and UAFA only offers one, the right of a citizen to sponsor their spouse (or in our case, “intended” spouse, “fiancée”, if you will, since many of us live in a permanent state of engagement while waiting for state laws to shake down and the federal government to recognize those).

Additionally, there was the unexpected xenophobic, anti-immigrant and/or general cluelessness in our community that immigration rights had anything to do with LGBT rights. Same-sex binational couples and our heart-wrenching stories of being forcibly separated from our partners or exiled from our country have been increasingly visible as the world gets smaller via technology and global opportunity. As the 21st century marches on, the chances of gay and lesbian Americans meeting a life partner from another country, through work, school, travel or the Internet will only increase. As same-sex binational couple activist and LezGetReal blogger Melanie Nathan has said, “We are all just one heartbeat away” from being in love with someone from another country.

Since the start of 2011, the flurry of activism around UAFA (the bill has not yet been reintroduced in the 112th Congress, but is expected to be soon – sign the Out4Immigration petition to bring it quickly forward) is an encouraging sign that the LGBT community and our supporters are going to stand up to Congress and President Obama and say “Enough!” No American should be forced to choose between the person they love and their country. It is unconscionable. Can anyone imagine a heterosexual American being asked to do this? Of course not!

Passing UAFA by adding the three simple words – “or permanent partner” to existing US immigration law would nicely dovetail two major issues in American politics that need to be addressed – the civil rights of LGBT Americans and immigration reform. While not marriage, it underscores the need for marriage recognition at the federal level because there are laws in America that truly do relegate gays and lesbians to second-class (or in the case of same-sex binationals, third-class) citizenship. While not comprehensive immigration reform, repairing this oversight that directly affects American citizens would be a first step toward repairing a system that is broken, and would hopefully open the door on more rational, perhaps even bipartisan discussion on CIR.

Here’s a roundup of the impressive coverage on same-sex binational couple immigration rights and UAFA since the beginning of the year.

• Judy Rickard’s book “Torn Apart: United by Love, Divided by Law” is available for pre-order from Findhorn Press. Enter the code OUT416 and a small donation will be made to Out4Immigration. Judy’s book tells the story of her relationship with Karin, a UK citizen and the many struggles they have encountered as a same-sex binational couple. But Judy doesn’t stop there. She’s backed up her story with that of 21 other same-sex binationals, added a comprehensive resource list and included a foreword by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love, who talks about her own experience as an American citizen in an opposite-sex binational relationship. This book is a must-have on the shelves of every library across America. Consider purchasing some copies and donating them to your local library and LGBT center.

• GetEQUAL Director Robin McGehee has demonstrated an impassioned interest in the rights of same-sex binationals and LGBT immigration, and wrote about this in her Huffington Post piece, “Obama’s Civil Rights Moment”, January 25, 2011.

• Popular LGBT columnist Dan Savage had an op-ed in the New York Times “A Gay Agenda for Everyone” in which he calls for passage of UAFA, January 22, 2011.

• Immigration Equality appears to be ramping up its team for a full-court press on UAFA once the bill is reintroduced. In the past year they have added grassroots staff, stepped up lobbying efforts on the Hill through their Action Fund and have an automated “Contact Congress” form that you can complete online to send your member of Congress an email urging his/her support of UAFA when it is reintroduced. Additionally, they continue to make the important argument that forcing same-sex binational couples out of the US adds to our country’s economic woes. See Steve Ralls piece following up President Obama’s January 26, 2011 State of the Union address, “The Economic Case for Inclusive Immigration Reform” on the Huffington Post.

• Immigration attorney Lavi Soloway, a co-author of UAFA in its initial form (Permanent Partner Immigration Act) and a founder of Immigration Equality, has launched a new project called Stop the Deportations: The DOMA Project to help same-sex binational couples who are legally married in various states fight federal immigration law. The story of Josh and Henry has 10,000 supporters on Facebook.

Note the tagline of this new organization is “The DOMA Project”. Make no mistake of where these cases are heading. Cautious optimism predicts DOMA repeal in 2013. While that may not seem very far off, when you are separated from your partner or your country by insurmountable visa issues and immigration laws, it is a lifetime.

"Torn Apart:: United by Love, Divided by Law" by Judy Rickard

Judy Rickard, a member of our group and an LGBT activist living in San Jose, CA has just written a book featuring stories from 21 same-sex binational couples (including 3 couples with young children) titled Torn Apart - United by Love, Divided by Law. It also features a foreword by Elizabeth Gilbert, the author of Eat Pray Love and Committed: A Love Story.

Proceeds or royalties from the sale of the book will benefit Out4Immigration, Love Exiles and Immigration Equality - however, if you pre-order today with the code OUT416 $4 will be directly donated towards Out4Immigration.

The book will be published sometime in May but you can pre-order your copy now.

You can read excerpt from the book here

Here is also an interview of Judy Rickard, the author of the book with the website, feetintwoworlds.

BTW - Judy took early retirement from working in the San Jose School district (and has had to take a reduced pension) because both she and her partner are both in their sixties and separated in two different countries. Judy wanted to have the ability to travel to visit her partner or even leave the US to live in exile. She has also been widely credited by Rep. Mike Honda of San Jose, CA for making him decided to include LGBT families in his immigration reform bill, the Reuniting Families Act. That action also led to Sen. Menendez to include LGBT families in his Comprehensive Immigration Reform bill during last session of Congress, and Rep. Guitierrez to say he will add same-sex couples in a House version of the bill. CIR was not brought up for a vote in 2010, but it is hoped that same-sex binational couples and our families will remain in the legislation when it is reintroduced in the future.

New American Media Op-Ed: Don’t Leave LGBT Families Out of Immigration Reform

Amos Lim was given an opportunity to respond to the recent media coverage about how including LGBT Families might jeopardise the entire immigration reform by Sandip Roy and New American Media. The op-ed can be read in full here.

Hope you would comment and rate the story! We need the help of the progressive community to continue working and exerting pressure to make sure that we will not be taken out!

Not many people realize that within the United States there are approximately 36,000 couples who are struggling to be together because they are binational same-sex couples. The Uniting American Families Act would allow U.S. citizens or permanent residents to sponsor their partners to become permanent residents.

Rep. Luis Gutierrez, D-Ill., and Rep. Mike Honda, D-Calif., recently held a press conference with more than 40 advocacy groups to urge congress to pass the Uniting American Families Act (UAFA) this year by ensuring that it gets included in comprehensive immigration reform.

Here in the state of California, our state legislature voted overwhelmingly in a bipartisan way a few weeks ago for AJR15 -- a joint resolution that makes California the first state to support the passage of UAFA and its inclusion in comprehensive immigration reform. (read the entire article here)

If you have not heard the radio interview on KALW where Sandip Roy spoke with Amos Lim, Judy Rickard and Joe Smith about LGBT Immigration, you can listen to them here.